I thought it appropriate to pencil down some words for those amongst us who have no idea about the MDG’s 2015, what they mean and what they imply.
The result is the Millennium Development Goals for Dummies.
End Poverty and Hunger
No, poverty does not mean that you can’t afford a second vehicle or that you can only afford to go on a two week holiday instead of a three week one. It also doesn’t mean that you can visit the beautician only once a month.
Poor are those that live on one (1) dollar or less a day.
In beer terms this means being able to buy only half a glass, in a developed country’s pub, a day.
The word ‘hunger’ refers to a situation in which there is a chronic shortage of food in your stomach.
It has nothing to do with hunger for money, hunger for victory or a bishop named Hunger that lived in the Netherlands and was the main character in Utrecht between 854 and 866. Not that I ever met him.
Ever looked at the stars and wondered what is out there. Ever wondered how far the moon is from earth? Well sorry, universal education has got nothing to do with studying the universe or the education of green men.
Universal education is meant for those living on planet earth and is aimed at sending every boy and girl to school so they can finish primary education (=what you learn at school). That is the education until roughly their twelfth (12th) year of life. Get it?
So you know what gender equality is? Wrong again. It does not mean that men have to become transvestites or have to remove those body parts that make them men.
Gender Equality in the MDG’s refers to the fact that boys and girls should have the same opportunities in secondary education (remember what education is?) and all levels of education afterwards. Yes, believe it or not, there are lots of people that like to study (unlike you).
Does not refer to not eating crisps or sucking candy. It also doesn’t refer to the band aid on that bruised knee or the gap between two (2) milk teeth. It’s a bit more serious than that.
Goal 4 tries to eliminate child death under the age of five (5) due to hunger (see above) and poverty.
Have a look at the below video.
There is absolutely nothing in it that has to do with the maternal care that goal 5 tries to improve. I said NOTHING!
What goal 5 tries to achieve is less baby dying while their mother is giving birth. It also aims to give women worldwide access (amongst other things) to contraceptives. (No, not those pills your daughter took to a Dance party. Those you gave her not to fall pregnant!)
Combat HIV/Aids, Malaria and TB
We are not talking about fighting gambling addiction and the ‘Happy In Vegas’ (HIV) mentality. We are talking about a sexually transmitted virus that is lethal. Malaria is also not the exotic name of a South American woman but a, by mosquitoes transmitted, disease that is extremely dangerous. TB stands for a disease of the lungs and not ‘Too Bad’ (as an answer for all the misery in the world).
Env-iron-mental has nothing to do with an iron mentality or something. Nor does sustainability have anything to do with a washing powder that removes stains.
This goal is trying to reduce loss of biodiversity ( I know, another difficult word, but it basically boils down to letting as many plant and animals species live and survive) and the access to clean drinking water (=liquid coming out of a tap). This goal also tries to reduce the number of people living in slums. You know, those houses built out of carton and scrap metal, that you produce so much of?
Please for once forget about playing golf and your glow balls. Also, the second word is alien to the boat your business partner recently bought.
Here we are speaking about worldwide cooperation when it comes to trading and financial systems , debt relieve and making technologies and communication widely available.
In case you still haven’t got a clue what the goals are trying to achieve, please refer back to goal 2.